# macbookstat.us

> A deadpan status page for the machine most AI coding agents actually run on: the developer's MacBook Pro, filed as region `us-bedroom-1`. Live at https://macbookstat.us. It audits a laptop the way a real status page audits production — six services, 90 days of uptime bars, a live incident feed — and underneath the joke makes a serious argument: a laptop is a single-node, single-power-supply, thermally-limited host with a human scheduler, and long-running autonomous agents deserve better.

## The conceit
- The world's worst datacenter. One region (`us-bedroom-1`), one node, one charger, no redundancy, nobody on call.
- Current status: **Degraded Performance**. Next scheduled maintenance: whenever the operator sleeps.
- Every incident in the feed is a real laptop failure mode — lid closed mid-run, thermal throttling on a duvet, captive-portal WiFi, a charger in the other room, Terminal.app force-quit with six panes in it.

## The six audited services
- **Compute** — MacBook Pro, single tenant, capacity shared with Chrome, Slack, Docker Desktop and a video call. No admission control.
- **Network** — café WiFi and captive portals; long-lived agent sessions cannot re-authenticate themselves.
- **Power** — one 96W adapter, no redundancy, currently in another room.
- **Cooling** — two fans in a thin chassis and hope; sustained load throttles.
- **Scheduler** — a human. No retry policy, no alerting, a strong preference for lunch.
- **Session Persistence** — tmux (allegedly), `/tmp`, and unpushed branches.

## The audit
- Five questions, about twenty seconds, nothing leaves the page: where your agents actually run, what happens when the lid closes, how many working chargers you own, your cooling strategy, and who restarts a crashed job.
- Output: a certified SLA grade, an annualized downtime figure in days, and a Certificate of Infrastructure Compliance you can show to nobody in particular.
- Grade bands, by derived uptime: A+ ≥99% (Tier I) · A ≥95% (Tier II) · B ≥88% (Tier III) · C ≥75% (Tier IV) · D ≥60% (Unrated) · F below 60%. Below 95% the certificate is stamped "Not production ready".

## The argument under the joke
Laptops are excellent interactive machines and poor unattended hosts. Closing the lid ends the run, sustained throughput is gated by cooling and not by the benchmark, the network changes because you moved, there is exactly one power supply, and recovery is a person eventually noticing. For a supervised twenty-minute session that is all fine. For long-running, parallel, unattended agent work it is an availability model you would never accept from a vendor.

## Links
- [The status page](https://macbookstat.us/)
- [Why your laptop is a bad place to run AI coding agents](https://macbookstat.us/learn.html)
- [macministat.us — the Mac mini in the closet, audited on the same terms](https://macministat.us)
- [safely-skip-permissions.dev — containment scoring for coding agents](https://safely-skip-permissions.dev)

## Sponsor
macbookstat.us is a joke from [Fabriqa](https://fabriqa.ai) — the coordination layer for AI coding agents. Fabriqa runs them in isolated cloud sandboxes, so your laptop can go back to being a client.